31 Day Writing Challenge #2: Day 25 - Used Tissue

A used  tissue danced across the stone slabs, carried by the coffee-scented breeze, as intermingling conversations vibrated through the air around her. Monica noticed none of it. She didn't feel the chill from the wind or the heat from the coffee cup in her hand. The tendrils of hair hitting her face in the wind and the pain from her finger nails digging into her palm, didn't register. All Monica could feel was her heart almost beating out of her chest and her mind racing, as a lump formed in her throat and her stomach knotted. 

She was back with him.

Monica could feel the familiar tide of desperation begging to pull her in and she could feel herself drowning in a sea of helplessness.

She looked across the table at her baby sister, her twenty-four year old, stubborn and broken baby sister. The person she'd always fought to protect.

There was so much commotion going on around the pair, but all Monica could see was the yellowing surrounding Phoebe's hazel eyes; the blue around her neck and the red etched on her cheeks and arms. The self-pity in her little sister's eyes devastated Monica, Phoebe used to be filled with so much life and light...and joy; it was heart-breaking to see that all gone. 

Phoebe sat staring at her sister, watched her process the truth that her bruises told; waiting for the reaction, like a deer caught in headlights waiting for impact.

"Oh Phoebe..." Monica thought she was going to break, her words were barely more a whisper. She reached across the table with both hands for her sister. Phoebe placed her shaking hands into her sister's open palms.

"Why?" Monica's eyes searched Phoebe's face, desperate to find an explanation. "Why would you go back?" 

At her words, Monica could see Phoebe start to shut down.

"No judgement, sweetie, I swear." Monica pleaded, "I just...I just want to understand. I really, I...really want to understand."

Phoebe eyed Monica suspiciously, but believing her sister's sincerity, began to unclench.

"I love him, Mon. I need to be with him." Phoebe's voice was small and neither sister was sure who she was trying to convince.

"Do you really need him, or is that just what he's got you believing? " Monica tried to be soft, but the venom was present in her voice.

"It's my choice, Monica! Back. Off." Phoebes's harsh, defensive tone hit Monica in the face.

"I know it is, but I'm not sure who has made it." Where once Monica would have been angry, now she was left feeling only defeated. After years of screaming matches over black eyes; interventions over domestic disturbance reports; tears over bite marks and scars and loss of contact because of his control, Monica didn't know what else to do. She didn't know how to save her sister. It killed her to admit that there was nothing she could do until Phoebe decided to get out for good. 

"Look, Phee, you know I want you away from him, and that I'd drag you kicking and screaming right now, if I could. But, I can't, so when you choose to get out, I will do whatever it takes to make it happen. I will be there every step of the way. You are not alone: now or ever. You hear me?" Monica's eyes bore into her sister's. "I just hope that time comes before he goes to far." 

Cracks splintered in Monica's heart at the thought, broken bones and images of her sister's bloody face raced through her head, and the terror was written all over her face.

"I can't leave." Phoebe couldn't even look at her sister as she uttered the words. "I just...I can't."

"Yes, you can. It's your choice. Remember?" 

A horn blared obnoxiously from the road nearby. Both women, and the majority of the crowd surrounding them, looked towards the noise. The face of rage personified glared at the women from the driver's window of  a blue Vauxhal Corsa. Monica glared back, while Phoebe fumbled around, collecting her belongings in a frenzy. She muttered a quick 'goodbye' to her sister and scurried towards the car, her head hung in penance. 

As she watched Phoebe's retreating form, part of her heart going with her, Monica couldn't quiet the worry that this could be the last time she saw her sister alive.